-More Than A Feeling-

By and large I'd say I'm fairly discontent with my life. There are more than a few things in it that I'd like to change and a great number of qualities that I wish I possessed. I know where I want to be and what I want in my life but for some reason I cannot seem to get them in line with where I am. The facets of life are fairly simple to grasp.

In life things are going to be good and things are going to be bad. You'll experience joy and you'll experience despair. With the passage of time you'll grow old. Slowly you will come to see the big picture of your life and either be ashamed with your choices or acknowledge the person that they made you. Then, at one point you will stop and that will be the end. Your life will be measured by those you love and those who have never met you. The sum of your accomplishments will be totaled; life will then go on.

Life is like a math problem. It's logical, it has a progression, and it has a solution. Everything equals a constant. By in large I've been really good at math problems. So why do I fail at life?

In math classes I struggled because I couldn't produce the work that lead up to the solution. I could produce solid answers but without the work they might as well have just remained blank. As such I spent time trying to figure out how I got to a correct answer. It was tedious, it was frustrating and more often than not, it led to me breaking a pencil and storming off. To me it was a pointless exercise to prove that I knew the solution; a solution that I didn't need work to come to. I think I may have been wrong in that belief...

There may have been more to showing my work than simply proving that I knew what I was doing. The point could have been to get me to see the steps that lead to the answer. Logical progression and all. Yeah, I knew the answer and, yeah, I understood how to get there, but I didn't know what the steps looked like. They existed, I knew that, just not in a way that I could touch or see. And so, having never really figured out how to show my work, once again I find myself sitting frustrated that I have the answers to some of my biggest problems but I just can't seem to produce the necessary steps that lead up to them.

The problems aren't difficult; there are just more than a few variables that need to be filled in to get the answers. M, P & S are easy enough; t & G, however, are things that I have no control over. Unfortunately t & G are the key factors in all my problems. Though, that is speaking in general terms. There are little sub-problems that lead up to the answers to the general variables. They're taxing and it's in them that I really begin to stumble over the required steps to get to their solutions.

So...

As for my discontent: I have an answer for that.
As for my shortcomings: I have an answer for that as well.